the child in me...

the child in me is gasping for air... ya, I still feel like a child (and I'm not gonna change that, why should I...I'm getting older every year-that's a fact, but still I don't need to be some cranky grown up forgetting how it's like to be a child).... still need my naive way of thinking...still need to play...still need to have fun, to explore things...to admire world for all the great things my childish eyes see... and I hate it... I hate the materialism... I hate the fact it all goes around money... I hate the way I'm not allowed to be a child... the pure one... sometimes I feel just by doing some things like I'm a child doing what grown ups are meant to be doing... and it sucks...I am so naive in my foolish idealistic way of looking at this world... I need to grow up? ... there must be something wrong with me...why can't I just accept the fact that this world is like this... and it wont change...
but still some kinda stupidity, foolishness (ok, now my friend Ivo would tell me-as he always does...that and I quote: ''people with your kinda enthusiasm about life could never be a fool...'') makes you go on...makes you do the changes you feel you need to do... and still at the end you're the one being hurt... I need to breathe... I need my freedom... (I need to travel... to my favorite place on earth... and do nothing...just be...) ... you see some kinda pattern over the past few posts...ya...I've been home for too long... I need a change... but for now I'll just settle with making a cake for my brother...(it's his b-day tomorrow...and yes I believe in cakes for b-days...) and listening to the most depressing songs ever written- that always makes me feel good...

animals at play

I will just point you out to this link... it's amazing... a husky and a wild polar bear playing... check it out here

tired

tired ....big time... I got up today at 6.30am went to work, than got home around one, eat something, went to my other job at 2pm... got home around 8pm... so ya... a bit tired (I better not use some other words... tired seems polite enough..;)) but hey... blame on me... I chose this... maybe it's just a sleepy day... or the fact I didn't go to sleep till midnight or something... which leads me to another conclusion... man, I admire those who get up at dawn... work all day... and take care of the whole family... and barley make it through a month with one paycheck... and they don't moan or say how tired they are...respect...
and than you see some kids who have no respect for money, for anything for that matter... and you see those politicians fooling around with our lives... our money... and still they can't get enough.... what a sad place this world is becoming... wait... I gotta correct myself... what a sad place this world IS...
and ya... it's not all so bad... you still got hope, love, people who make you laugh... and other stuff to make yourself forget about the problems... ;) why bother with something you can't change, right... I may be in my ''toxic'' mood today... (the hell I am)
today I got another job offer, but 3 jobs would be impossible... not with this kinda schedule of mine... anyhow... why I even started writing about this... I was thinking today, to quit it all, and to find some other job... but than again...
me and my complex mind... I can't get myself in some kinda straight line... always gotta look aside... for something better...
ya, that's about it... enough with self-pity! ;)

snow

This is how my little town looks like today... woooohooooo!!! I love it... ideal winter day...;) can't help it ... I LOVE IT!! :)
Ow, and I wanted to get my cat to go out...- mission impossible..;) crazy little thing wont even think about it... so I brought her some snow inside...it was crazy... her first contact with snow...;)

snow, milk, blog, candles

so...I nearly deleted my blog today - don't ask how I managed to do that! I don't even know... I have to get it ... in some kinda black mood... :) this way it's just too cold-well ok, it's winter time...but still...maybe by the time spring comes I'll get it in some proper mood... ;) till than I'm not touching anything anymore...so I don't end up deleting it all...

There's snow again today... I love it... been outside, took some photos, made some movies... I can't help it I love snow... I guess I owe it all to my dog, the one we used to have for 12 years, Yerry... amazing dog...German shepherd... he loved snow!!! so I spent a lot of time outside with him...;)
Damn!! - because... for the second time I've been heating myself milk in microwave... and for the second time I forgot about it and figured it out once it got cold... I think I need some pills - I forget too much!!!

Anyhow.... don't know about you all...but I'm already in that new years, Christmas mood....;) and we even got snow...so...;) I just hope there'll be snow for Christmas as well...
ok, I'll go and make myself that cocoa now... to get a bit warmed up... I guess love doesn't keep me warm enough... ;)

ok, I shouldn't forget... I lighted a candle for the world day of remembrance for road traffic victims. It was initiated by RoadPeace in 1993, and is now being observed by more and more people from all over the world... a Day of Remembrance for Road Accident Victims, will be observed on the third Sunday in November each year. So go light a candle...

photos

Here you can check out some of my photos, from what I do to where I've been...
I'm not so pleased with Flickr... because you can only have 3 sets in which you can include your photos... I guess there should be more- but as usual nothing is free...;) and... I'm missing a feature that would allow you to have a button on your blog or on your page that would point you to your profile on flickr... Do they have that? (and I didn't find it?)
Apart from that I'm not sure how my photos are protected, when you can get any just by clicking on it and save it... but I gotta figure it all out still...
But ...I'm finally happy how I arranged my photos in this 3 limited sets...so take a look...I made some changes...didn't like some of those I had on before...;)
Enjoy...;)

11.11.

I didn't even know about this 'till yesterday... I met with my friend James and his girlfriend (they've been traveling a bit for the past few days and they stopped in Ljubljana as well) they're Australians, but they live in London now for couple of years... and they told me about this- Remembrance day... they have it every year all Australians, a minute of silence on 11.11. at 11 o'clock, no matter where you are at that time you gotta stop and have a minute of silence for this day, when they signed the end of the world war 1.
What all don't we know, or forget about... I think it's great they have this, so they remember this important date. You can read more about if you click here.

Also in Slovenia today is a feast, St.Martin's Day- something more is written about it by our English profesor Sasa and by Andrej, it's about wine!! :) The day when young/new wine is ready to be tasted.

my box

I think you should blame it on the book I'm reading at the time - ''whatever you think, think the opposite'' by Paul Arden ...it's given me more lets say courage to do this... ;) well ok not courage, but... who cares... I wanted to show you this... stuff I JUST LOVE TO DO... because I wanna get some more opinions on what people think of these little boxes of mine... anyhow...here I am...on display...just a part of what I do in my free time, and now it's up to you to state your opinions, thoughts, criticism, whatever comes to your mind...
thanks!

philosophy

I must be insane... with all the work I have I still can't help but wonder about all the little unimportant (well I guess they must be in some way important to my mind...) things... I guess this is a side effect from being so fascinated about how my mind works, how my thoughts work, what does it all mean, why do some things come to my mind, how come I can make some things go the way I want them to, why do some things happen... and than I went to a library and got myself packed with books which got me even more confused about the matter but at the same time it got me thinking... so I guess all in all- a good thing... Here are my biggest
obsessions (kidding...but I love reading something even though I than, sometimes-well most of the times- come to a conclusion I don't agree with them..); Sigmud Freud and Nitzche.
I love reading books that get me thinking about everything... that get me questioning everything... I have a friend who's even more into this than I am and we talk about it, she tells me about some new (new for me) experiments and it's amazing what our mind is capable of, so I definitely believe that it's all just in our heads... you can do so many great things just by having a straight idea in your mind about what you want... that reminds me - you should read this book, DEMIAN - Herman Hesse ... ;)
I know... I start one thing and write about everything else... but it's all connected in a way... that's what happens when you got lots of things on your mind... my friend once said to me that she admires me for being able to handle all those labyrinths in my head ;) (well I took that as a good thing) ...but like everyone sometimes I just love to sit back and not think about anything...but that rarely happens.
So, I just wanted to post a link to this cool thought experiment Mary's room proposed by Frank Jackson.

picture of the labyrinth used on this post